Articles
The Book of G: Thirty Years of Golfapalooza
What follows isn't the minutes. The minutes are somewhere in an old news archive and now a phone app, and they are extremely thorough about who owes S...
Dosky-Sep 1
No More Lost Lines
NO MORE LOST LINES Golfapalooza Technology Has Finally Caught Up With Golfapalooza Stupidity For nearly 30 years, Golfapalooza has had a serious recor...
Jambone-Aug 31
Seven Agonizing Minutes
The KGB Cup round for GXXX is set to begin almost exactly seven days from right now. That means 168 hours, or 10,080 minutes, that we all must suffer ...
GStan-Aug 27
Did You Pay?
DID YOU PAY? A Golfapalooza Financial Services Public Service Announcement We are now officially two weeks from Golfapalooza XXX, which means Loozers ...
Jambone-Aug 20
2026 Round 1 Preview
Thursday Pairings Announced GXXX Preview 11 Groups, 43 Loozers, 1 Winner, and Zero Accountability Golfapalooza is finally upon us and the Loozers are ...
Jambone-Aug 15
A Day in the Life of a Loozer
An Hour-by-Hour Breakdown of Controlled Chaos 6:30 AM – The First Movement Someone is awake. No one knows why. No one respects it. You’ll hear: a door...
Jambone-Aug 12
The Highly Scientific Guide to Winning a Golfapalooza Scramble
A scramble is the purest form of golf. Four men. One ball. Unlimited opinions. And absolutely no one keeping track of how many Fireball shots seemed l...
Quack-Aug 1
MEET THE LOOZERS
Meet the Loozers: The Greatest Collection of Questionable Human Beings Ever Assembled If you haven’t spent at least an hour creeping through the new L...
Jambone-Jul 7Options are Open!
Welcome to the New World! Options for GXXX officially open today and can be accessed exclusively through the Golfapalooza app. Through the app you wil...
Randy Watson-May 22
Rookies Guide to Golfapalooza
The Unwritten Rules of Golfapalooza An Official Advisory to Incoming Rookies If you are reading this as a Rookie, welcome. You’ve probably been told t...
Jambone-May 14
The Golfapalooza Soundtrack Has Arrived!
There was a time… not long ago… when Golfapalooza music meant whatever someone’s phone happened to be connected to the cart Bluetooth at that exact mo...
Jambone-May 1
There's An App For That.
The Golfapalooza organization is proud to announce that the official app experience has arrived, and it's unlike anything the golf world has ever seen...
Quack-Apr 15
Cornhole Doubles Bracket Revealed
BETHEL PARK, PA — Following Friday's Singles bracket reveal, Founding Father Michael "Sheiker" Long walked to the podium to announce this year's teams...
Quack-Aug 24
Cornhole Singles Promises Major Fireworks!
POWELL, OH — Founding Father Brian "Butter" Flanagan stepped up to the podium, flashed his smile and quickly jumped into this year's Cornhole Singles ...
Quack-Aug 22
Draft Day Drama: Teams Chafed and Loaded Take Shape
TERRA ALTA, WV — Last night at 6:00 PM Eastern, the captains of the 2025 KGB Cup — Greg “Double G” Garrett of Team Loaded and Rick “Dosky” Dosky of Te...
Quack-Aug 16
Apparel Link Ready For Launch
COLUMBUS, OH — After many communication gaps, email glitches, vacations, and assorted other breakdowns the Golfapalooza XXVIIII merchandise portal is ...
Quack-Aug 12
GXXVIIII Fees Set
TERRA ALTA, WV — As we reach the 90-day mark until GXXVIIII it's time to formally announce this year's costs. After being able to hold costs flat last...
Quack-Jun 24Registration and Options now open
BETHEL PARK, PA — The Golfapalooza Founding Fathers convened a press conference to announce the opening of the registration cycle for GXXVIIII. Father...
Quack-Mar 21